Feel Great in your Fall Sweaters!

🌱 Today’s post is by guest blogger Laura Sinclair, a professional home organizer and certified KonMari™ Consultant.

(Photo credit: Laura Sinclair)

(Photo credit: Laura Sinclair)

Fall is upon us, and with it comes cozy fall sweaters!

You may also be thinking about fall cleaning and getting your home ready for the holidays... Feeling overwhelmed? You are not alone.  

Getting physically organized helps with our mental well-being. Spending some time organizing can decrease your stress and overwhelm this season. However, the act of organizing can be very overwhelming, too. So where to start? And how to proceed?  Marie Kondo is a Japanese organizer who created The KonMari Method™ in her book, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. She recommends that you always begin with your clothes.

Why not start with one small category—your fall sweaters. You know you're excited to see these old friends! ;)

(Photo credit: Laura Sinclair)

(Photo credit: Laura Sinclair)

Step 1: Make a pile

Remove all of your sweaters from the closets, drawers, etc. Check every room of the house and any boxes where you may store seasonal items. It is important to find ALL of your sweaters before you begin.

Step 2: Top Three

Pick out your favorite three sweaters from the pile. Hold them. Notice the joy and positive feelings you get when you hold them. As Marie Kondo would say, do they "spark joy"? Those are the feelings that you want to replicate.



Step 3: One-by-One

Now, go through the pile and pick up one sweater at a time. Notice how it makes you feel. Do you feel joy? Do you love it? Do you want to put it on and wear it all day? If so, keep it with confidence! Do this with each item.

Step 4: Reflect

Are you unsure about your feelings? Ask yourself WHY you are having a hard time deciding whether or not to keep a sweater. What is getting in the way? Was it a gift? Was it expensive? Did it used to be your favorite? Take the time to reflect on the "why". You can journal or talk it out with a friend, too.

(Photo credit: Laura Sinclair)

(Photo credit: Laura Sinclair)

Step 5: Fold & Store

Have you tried folding and storing your sweaters vertically? It makes it easier to see them all at once, and it reduces wrinkles!

Click here for a great thirty-second youtube video that demonstrates how to fold using the KonMari Method. The video was created by KonMari Consultant Ann Dooley of Simple Joy with Ann.


Step 6: Gratitude

Donate those sweaters that no longer support you today. Be grateful for the support they have you in the past.

Great job!  You have just finished your first tidying session! Now, pick a sweater and enjoy the rest of this fall day. :)


This blog post was originally posted on the Flourish Organizing website.

Laura Sinclair is a professional home organizer and certified KonMari Consultant. As the owner of Flourish Organizing, she combines her love of teaching and organizing to help people to declutter, reorganize, and solve their daily frustrations. Find out more at https://flourishorganizing.com/about.html

Mindful shopping: another "side effect" of tidying up!

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Since I completed my KonMari journey, I've become a more careful and mindful shopper. I almost never make impulse purchases. In fact, my problem is usually that I wait too long while considering whether to buy it or not--and then they're sold out of my size!

Some questions I have found helpful to ask myself before buying clothing:

  • Does this item fit my lifestyle? Will I wear this, or do I just like the idea of wearing it?

  • Do I already own a similar item? Is there a compelling reason why I should buy an additional one?

  • Can I get a better quality item, or a more reasonably priced item, somewhere else?

  • Which other items in my wardrobe will "go" with this item to make an outfit?

  • Is this an item that I would want to make myself? Or is it worth it to me to purchase one that someone else has made?

  • How do I feel about supporting this particular company or seller? Are they an ethical business? A small business? Local? Woman and/or minority owned?

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I've recently acquired two vintage sweaters to add to my joy-sparking wardrobe. I love buying vintage things when I can. They're often better-made and cost less than the equivalent item costs new today. And I find that I often prefer the styles (being that I am a retro fashion weirdo). The only drawback is that I'm 5'10" with athletic shoulders and long arms; sometimes I have to look long and hard to find vintage items that will fit me. But that's part of the "thrill of the hunt" that comes with vintage and thrift shopping. Another benefit is feeling good about being more sustainable, by giving new life to a pre-owned item that's still in great shape.

What kind of a shopper are you? Have you changed your shopping habits from what they used to be? Why or why not? 🌱

"Being organized" isn't a goal. Dig deeper.

“It’s not about the dress you wear, but it’s about the life you lead in the dress.” - Diana VreelandPhoto by @thelazyartistgallery from @pexels

“It’s not about the dress you wear, but it’s about the life you lead in the dress.”
- Diana Vreeland

Photo by @thelazyartistgallery from @pexels

Tidying up is never really about the stuff. When we say something sparks joy, we mean it sparks joy for us. Objects without context are merely objects; it is we who imbue our possessions with meaning. That's why the first step in deciding which dresses (or any other belongings) you should keep is to decide what kind of life you want to live. 

It's tempting to skip the self-reflection, and get right to the "decluttering" part. But the decluttering part will go much more smoothly if you're guided by your vision. 

"Being organized" isn't a goal. Dig deeper. The more specific, the better.

😐"I want to clean this place up" vs. 😍"I'd really like to be able to invite friends over for dinner and enjoy their company, without worrying what they think of my house." 

😐"I want to clear out my closet" vs. 😍"I want getting dressed in the morning to be a stress-free experience that makes me feel good about myself." 

😐"I want an organized kitchen" vs. 😍"I want my kitchen to be clean, tidy, and well organized so that I'll enjoy cooking wholesome meals as part of a healthy lifestyle for myself and my family." 

What kind of life do you want to lead in that dress? 🌱

Tidying up is about the life YOU want

“Being organized isn't about getting rid of everything you own or trying to become a different person; it's about living the way you want to live, but better.”  —Andrew MellenPhoto by @bolovtsova from @Pexels

“Being organized isn't about getting rid of everything you own or trying to become a different person; it's about living the way you want to live, but better.” —Andrew Mellen

Photo by @bolovtsova from @Pexels

Sometimes, picture-perfect pantries on Pinterest can shake our confidence. “Eep, my spice rack doesn't look like that! Am I doing this all wrong?” Or maybe it's someone else's minimalist capsule wardrobe. “Ack, I have more than three t-shirts! Does that make me a loser?”

OK, I know I might have put that in a slightly silly way. But my point is: tidying up is about the life YOU want to live, and no one else can define for you what that is. That's why it's so important to do some self-reflection before wildly discarding everything but a toothbrush and a pair of pants like we saw some minimalist person on the internet doing.

I believe that within each of us, there is a part that already knows what brings us joy and what kind of life we want to live. A tidying journey is the process of learning to listen to that part. And it's wonderful to be inspired by others. Just don't forget to take inspiration from yourself too.

Looking to clear the clutter and create a joyful home that works for you? I'm here to provide guidance, support, and accountability. Contact me to get the conversation started. 🌱

I had the best office today!

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I had the best office today! The hubs & I were driving home from a family visit in Missouri, but took a break at a lovely park in Springfield IL so I could do a virtual tidying session with a client in the Chicago suburbs.

Truth be told, before the Covid situation arose, I never imagined myself doing virtual tidying. Well, obviously I've had to rethink that. And fortunately, I've discovered that for me, it sparks a lot of joy. While video conferencing isn't the same as in-person interaction, it is truly amazing what we can do with the magic of technology. We can see and hear each other, we can show each other things. We can make that all-important connection. 

Just like in-person tidying, virtual tidying can provide emotional support and encouragement, structure and accountability, and inspiration. Advantages include:

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✳️Being able to work with a professional organizer, even if there are none located near you.
✳️Being able to work with the specific person you desire to work with, even if they’re not nearby.
✳️The ability to maintain social distancing in this age of Covid
✳️Sessions are often shorter (60 to 90 minutes). Ideal for people with busy schedules. If you prefer to go longer--such as a 3 to 5 hour session with breaks in between--we can do that too!
✳️Some tidying can be completed as homework. More cost effective if you're on a budget.
✳️Offers you more time flexibility--no need to block out a half-day for an organizing session.

Ready to embark on your tidying journey? I'd be honored to be your guide. Contact me to get the conversation started.🌱

Tidying is the act of confronting yourself

Photo by @koprivak.art from @Pexels

Photo by @koprivak.art from @Pexels

"Tidying is the act of confronting yourself; cleaning is the act of confronting nature." - Marie Kondo

"Tidying" and "cleaning" are often used interchangeably, but the meanings are really quite different. When we tidy, we move items and put them away, whereas when we clean, we are removing dirt.

Dirt and dust tend to naturally accumulate, without us doing anything at all. It's a law of the universe. But often you will hear people talk about items "piling up", or "finding their way in". The truth is that objects don't grow legs and walk into our homes. We bring them in. Therefore the responsibility for clutter lies with us.

This means that tidying is the act of confronting ourselves. And the process of self-confrontation can get uncomfortable at times, because we are asking ourselves questions such as:

🔸 Why is this item in my house?
🔸 What was I thinking/feeling when I bought this?
🔸 Why have I kept this item for so long?
🔸 Why do I have so many of ______?
🔸 Why do I find it so difficult to get rid of this item?

The good news is, if we are willing to go through the process and tolerate some discomfort, the rewards are amazing. Confronting ourselves and making decisions, rather than putting them off until "later", can leave us feeling joyfully tidy, both inside and out.

Are you ready to confront yourself?🌱

How I learned an important lesson: Never tidy other people's belongings without permission

Several years ago, I was helping my mom clear out her garage, when I came across a box of toy soldiers. "Those belong to your brother," Mom said. "They've been in here for years."

I remembered my brother playing with them when we were kids, but that was a long time ago. We were all adults now, with families of our own. Surely he would never miss these items. After all, they'd been sitting at Mom's house forever.

Read more

It's important to visualize your journey's end


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“Before you start, visualize your destination. Think in concrete terms so that you can vividly picture what it would be like to live in a clutter-free space.”

— Marie Kondo

You might think that the first step of the tidying process is to begin discarding things. But wait -- before you start out on a journey, wouldn't it be good to have some idea of where you would like to end up?

Why even start tidying in the first place? Why is it worth doing?

It's important to visualize your journey's end. What kind of life do you want to have? Specific goals are more helpful than broad, vague ones.

"I want to clean this place up" vs. "I'd really like to be able to invite friends over for dinner and enjoy their company, without worrying what they think of my house."

"I want to clear out the clutter" vs. "I want my sewing table to be easily accessible and my supplies organized, so I can have fun working on sewing projects."

"I want to be healthier" vs. "I want my kitchen to be clean, tidy, and well organized so that I'll enjoy cooking healthy meals there."

Imagine your ideal lifestyle. Then get it out of your head and into a tangible form. You can take notes, draw pictures, write a blog post, make a vision board — or whatever works for you. You can focus on things you want to have or do, but the most important thing to focus on is how you want to feel.

Need a tidy coach? I'm here to help. Get in touch with me -- I'd love to hear from you!


On clutter-free holiday gifting


"Give experiences, not things."

"Give them the gift of less stuff."

"Connection over consumption."

I've been seeing this message everywhere lately, and it could not be more timely. At no time in human history has there ever been more stuff for us to acquire and accumulate. But do any of us really need more items, objects, or things?

Some ideas for gifts that don't add to the pile of stuff:

  • Gift cards (or e-gift cards)

  • Lessons, classes or activities (cooking, dance, languages, skydiving)

  • Tickets to movies, music, performance, or sporting events

  • Food and drink

  • Flowers

  • Time (plan a date, host a dinner party, offer babysitting or housekeeping services)

  • Donate to a charity in the person's name

If you're giving a tangible item, furoshiki (traditional Japanese method of wrapping gifts in squares of fabric) is big this year (thanks Marie Kondo!) It's beautiful and the "wrapping paper" can be used again and again.

I have one more idea I'd like to suggest, and it's not a "friend date" to go have coffee. Or airplane tickets. Or homemade cookies. Although all of these things sound quite nice.

Don't get me wrong, if you truly love giving gifts in the usual sense of the word, and would feel something missing without doing so, then by all means, keep giving them. And may they bring joy to both you and the recipients.

But if you find that you've simply exchanged the pressure of having to rush around, desperately seeking the perfect item for each person, for the pressure of having to come up with the perfect edible gift or "experience gift", then what's really changed?

Idea: Give the gift of being present. Give the gift of listening, really listening. Give the gift of letting them know how important they are to you. Express it in words, or write it down in a heartfelt card or letter. Give the gift of your undivided attention. Make them the center of your universe. For five seconds, five minutes, or five hours.

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Gratitude on Thanksgiving Day and always


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My husband and I have a place that we like to visit once or twice a year, up in northern Wisconsin. It's a resort on a lake that's been run by the same family since the 1920s. When I say "resort", that makes it sound fancy, but it's actually a group of small wooden cabins you can rent for less per night than it costs to stay at a Best Western.

The bed in the cabin we usually rent is small--especially for two tall people--but we still manage to sleep well there. The kitchen is also small, but you can cook a meal in it. There's a cosy living room with a fireplace, an itty-bitty bathroom, mix-and-match rustic decor that hasn't been updated in a long time. No wi-fi or even a TV. We love everything about this place--how simple, quiet and old-fashioned it is.

One time we were up there and had just finished our dinner (ribeyes, baked potatoes & salad) and were relaxing with some red wine while watching the stars come out over the lake. The thought occurred to me: "Do people who have zillions of dollars more than I have, enough to buy this little old resort and this beautiful lake and all the land around it and a bunch of other stuff besides--do they experience exponentially larger amounts of joy than I'm experiencing right now?"

I knew the answer was no.

With all the constant messaging of "more money is always better" so you can buy more things and more things and more things, with the ever-present drumbeat of "get rid of that old thing so you can get this newer better thing that will finally make you happy", it's worth remembering that it's not how much we have that brings happiness. It's how much we appreciate what we have.

We all have the capacity to feel joy, to see beauty in our own lives. We don't have to postpone happiness until we've acquired enough things, items, and objects to "complete" us. We can choose to feel grateful and fortunate for what we have now.

I'm thankful for everything I have. Not just today, but every day.

What's sparking joy for me lately: cold workouts!


Not Hawaii

Not Hawaii

What's sparking joy for me lately? Working out outside, in the cold. Yes, really.

I'm originally from Hawaii, where it's almost always T-shirt weather. But I live in Chicago, and it's winter here right now.

As a dyed-in-the-wool fitness dork, I don't like to let coldness and snow get in the way of what I want to do. I'm a rucking enthusiast (rucking = hiking with a weighted pack), and rucking takes place outdoors, whatever the weather. That includes when it's cold, freezing, or even frigid.

Darn low basement ceilings!

Darn low basement ceilings!

True, I also do non-rucking workouts in my snow-free basement. But due to the low ceiling, if I want to do certain exercises, such as pull-ups or lifting weights over my head, I have to go outside in my yard. Like this:

I don't actually enjoy being cold, and I'm definitely not one of those "hot blooded", no-hat-or-socks people who don't seem to feel the cold.

However, I figured out a while ago that if I decided to like cold weather, and expose myself to it often, it actually ended up feeling much less uncomfortable and more bearable. Not just bearable, but even beautiful. Exhilarating. Whereas if I hated winter, only exercised indoors, and only exposed myself to perfectly climate-controlled temperatures until spring came and the weather turned "nice" again, it made me less tolerant of the cold, and not quite as physically fit. And winter still lasted the same amount of time.

Follow this trail to the discomfort zone.

Follow this trail to the discomfort zone.

This doesn't have to do only with rucking or cold weather.

The act of confronting our relationship with our belongings--which is really the act of confronting how we want to live our lives--can be uncomfortable.

It can be hard to leave our comfort zone because it's familiar, and the area outside that zone looks different than we're accustomed to. Just thinking about going out there can cause us to recoil, to stay where we are, even though we're not satisfied with where we are. But it's hard to make any progress at anything if we stay huddled within those boundaries. It's hard to pursue the lives we truly desire, to recognize the things, activities, ideas, and people that bring us joy and let go of those that no longer serve us--if we don't look beyond the fence.

I'm not saying you have to be into winter rucking. Believe me, I understand that's not for everybody. I'm saying get uncomfortable with being uncomfortable some of the time--whatever form that might take for you.

If you've made yourself go outside and you're standing there shivering in the cold and you start moving around, you warm up. You might even start sweating and have to remove a layer of clothing. You might start enjoying being out there, and noticing the beauty of winter. The solitude of having the whole trail to yourself. Naked trees revealing their true shapes against a grey-white sky. The particular blue color found only in shadows cast on snow. The way the winter sun touches the ice, turning it into molten gold.

If you're okay with experiencing a bit of discomfort, you recalibrate your sense not just of what's comfortable, but what's possible.

Winter has its own beauty.

Winter has its own beauty.

Rearranging my bookshelf


I rearranged my books this weekend.

Before: These are Serious Books!

Before: These are Serious Books!

It started when I looked at our bookshelf and realized that something--no, somebody--was bugging me. Actually, it was four somebodies: Winston Churchill, Bruce Catton, Shelby Foote, and J.R.R. Tolkien. My husband and I own series by each of these authors, and while we consider them very much worth keeping (and yes, re-reading), I realized that I didn't really like the "These Books Are The Weightiest and Most Serious Tomes We Own and They Must Always Live Together on the Top Shelf, Right Side" thing we had going on.

So I moved them away from eye level, and all to different places.

The six volumes of Churchill's The Second World War now reside on the third shelf, accompanied by a selection of pre- and post-WWII history books. The Civil War trilogies by Bruce Catton and Shelby Foote also live on the third shelf but on the opposite end, next to our other Civil War titles. J.R.R. Tolkien's Lord of The Rings books now live on the second shelf, near some other favorite fantasy and science fiction tales.

After: A little less serious

After: A little less serious

What's on the top shelf, right side now: books about Chicago, the American West, our National Parks, paddling, hiking, and nature guides.

Somehow our personal library feels a lot lighter. I feel more inclined to walk up to the bookshelf and pick something out. And yet we have the same books.

It's kind of like I broke up the group of kids in the classroom that talked the loudest, and moved them all to different desks in different corners of the room. Not to silence them--they do have important things to say--but to give the other kids a chance to be heard.

Sometimes it's not just what you own. It's where you put it.

What's sparking joy for me lately: fishing


I got into fly fishing this year. It was kind of an accident. Back in April, I had set aside a weekend to do a backpacking trip with a group from my gym, but the trip got cancelled due to lack of interest. Disappointed, and determined to use that weekend to do something else fun, I searched around on the internet and found an activity that caught my interest: a two-day fly fishing school in Wisconsin, run by a fishing store here in Chicago.

Turns out, the southwestern part of Wisconsin is a hot spot for trout fishing, with thousands of miles of beautiful trout streams.

I hadn't gone fishing since I was a kid. "I dunno, two full days of fishing might be way more than we're interested in, but we'll see how it goes," I remember saying to my husband. Six months later, we both now own fancy fly rods and reels, polarized sunglasses, waders, and a variety of accessories. We've fished in three states (Illinois, Wisconsin and Wyoming). We've caught actual fish, and have the "Hey, look at this fish I caught!" photos to prove it.

Did I mention I read whole books about fish and where they might likely be found in streams?

My first brown trout

My first brown trout

Don't get me wrong, I'm mostly still a newb. There's so much to learn! There have been times I've gotten frustrated (like when I've gotten my line tangled or my fly stuck in a tree). But mostly I'm really excited about it.

So, what's so joyful about fishing? Well, for starters, it's something that my husband and I can enjoy together. It fits right in with our love of camping and the outdoors.

Fishing brings you closer to nature--to the fish, the insects and other critters they eat, the streams, the surroundings, the weather, the seasons.

Fishing is a skill. You learn by experience--and from other people. The hubs and I hired a guide to take us on a half-day fishing trip recently. He taught us so much & we had a blast.

Catching a fish is a thrill. There's this wild animal on the end of your line, all shiny eyes and sharp little teeth and beautiful colors, so alive. (So far, I've let most of my fish go. I've only eaten a few, with gratitude.)

Fishing is physically, mentally, and spiritually satisfying. It's all about being present in the moment, about focusing on what you're doing right now.

Fishing is an activity I hope to enjoy for the rest of my life.

What’s sparking joy for you lately?

Tidying Mom's storage space


Me with a cartload of items destined to be donated .
 

You might not think of paper as the most sentimental of categories, but the papers in the storage space packed the biggest emotional whallop for Mom and me.

 
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But after all, Dad didn't need these papers any more. Mom and I decided that he'd be okay with us letting them go. It doesn't change how much we love him, or how proud we are of his service as a state representative.

This August I visited my mom in Hawaii, where she lives (and where I spent my high school years). Of course we did the typical things we always do: go to the beach, walk the dog, and eat a lot of yummy "local grinds" (food, that is).

And then there was a non-typical, somewhat daunting vacation task: clearing out Mom's storage space.

Mom had been renting a 10 foot by 8 foot unit at a local self storage facility. She explained, "When your Dad's health began to decline, all this stuff was in the way. I just needed to get it all out of the house."

Dad had been gone seven years now, and Mom really wanted to clear the space out and be able to save the $244 monthly rental fee. But as a busy community organizer and activist, she hadn't been able to find the time. Every so often she would go to the space and tackle a few items, but most of the stuff remained. And she wasn't sure exactly what was in every one of those boxes and containers. After all, it had been a while.

We definitely needed to get the space cleared in one fell swoop, because I was only going to be there for a week. So we went over there and took stock of things.

The space contained three shelving units, each about 8 feet high. Each shelf was stacked with either plastic bins or cardboard boxes. As we began to pull boxes and bins down and investigate their contents, we found there were several categories of stuff.

First, there were household items such as clothing, decorations, books, and random knicknacks. These were mostly Mom's things, and she and I were able to divide them fairly quickly into "keep", "sell", "donate", and "discard" piles.

There were several boxes of games and miniatures that belonged to my brothers. We marked these as "keep", making a mental note to ask later if they still wanted them. There were also boxes of my brothers' high school and college notes. Mom and I felt confident putting these in the "discard" pile.

Then there were picture frames. Lots and lots of picture frames. Some contained photos, but many were new and still in their packaging. An avid photographer, Dad had always enjoyed framing enlargements of his favorite photos. Mom and I appreciated this, of course, as one of the many ways Dad showed us how much he loved us. But we also had to chuckle at how Dad's framing ambitions had turned out to be much greater than the available wall display space in my parents' modestly sized home.

The new picture frames went into our "sell" pile. We decided to remove all the framed photos and put them aside for later inclusion in a photo album, which takes up a lot less space. The reclaimed frames would be sold or donated.

Finally, there was the largest category: paper. My Dad, a retired Foreign Service officer and former state representative, had always had a thing about paper. He saved all of it.

We quickly realized that most of the papers in the storage space dated from Dad's time at the Hawaii State Legislature. He served ten years and was a prolific writer. There were many papers relating to bills he had helped pass, including letters to various departments and officials. There were also op-eds he wrote for the newspaper.

You might not think of paper as the most sentimental of categories, but the papers in the storage space packed the biggest emotional whallop for Mom and me. It was the way Dad had stored them. There were hundreds of large manila envelopes, each meticulously packed with letters, articles, and often additional envelopes full of more papers and business cards. We also found tax returns dating from as early as 1977, also carefully packaged in manila envelopes.

In his own way, Dad had probably felt that he was being organized and taking care of things for us, with his elaborately nested envelope system. And here we were discarding most of it, save for the best pieces of writing and a few photos.

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But after all, Dad didn't need these papers any more. Mom and I decided that he'd be okay with us letting them go. It doesn't change how much we love him, or how proud we are of his service as a state representative.

And that's how Mom and I ended up getting the storage space cleared out. It took us several sessions of about 3 hours each. Now Mom has more money in her pocket each month, and the storage space is no longer an unfinished task hanging over her head. And we said goodbye to Dad, again.

It's never just about the stuff.